Day: 11, 12 and 13...I think...

So I'm really losing track of the days here. It's either a day that I spend money, or a day that I don't.

This past week has been tough. I got a whole load of things I totally wasn't expecting, and a whole load of things, I totally was.

I had a lot of bland food...just when I thought I couldn't eat any more quinoa...I didn't have much choice. So I made an executive decision. I bought a burrito. Not just any burrito. I gotta tell ya, I've tried a few burrito/taco places and have never been impressed - in all sorts of places, like California, Ontario, the South Eastern U.S., and B.C. Then my friend told me to try out Chronic Tacos on Broadway in Vancouver. What an awesome joint. I love the vibe when I go in there, and my burrito always fills me up so I don't have to eat again for the rest of the day. And it tastes so good. Especially with the half bottle of hot sauce that I put on it. MMMM. So yes. I overspent. I spent just over $9 on a burrito (including tip). I even scored a free bottle of hot sauce (this rocks because I'm just about out!)... So did I really overspend? I guess it's all relative isn't it? According to my "rules" for this challenge...yes, I overspent. Just like I did on the $10 almonds. And just like I did on the Emergen-c. But in the long run - the next month - I'm actually spending less than I would if I were to buy these things in smaller amounts a couple times a week. It still doesn't mean I can afford them. But, do I have much choice?

My friend helped me move all my stuff from "storage" (yes quotation marks - it's a long story - but my stuff was held hostage until recently) to my new-ish place (4 hours, 3 trips, free help, free use of the landlord's truck - I repaid her with a single packet of Emergen-c ). Usually these things all cost money. My friend even bought me a taco (yes, I totally went to Chronic Tacos twice in one day) ...without me knowing until it was on my plate and paid for. Friends rule! Even though I'm only here for another 2 months, I had to move all my stuff. It's great to have all my things in one place again. Not for the sake of having stuff, but just because they are so darn handy. Things like my coffee maker, coffee filters, and coffee grinder that allow me to actually use the free coffee I got. And my tea pot. Candles - to make my room smell better after all the beans I've been eating (damn beans)... Laundry Detergent .... Shampoo ..... Conditioner ..... Soap ...... things I was running short of in my house, and now, because I saved them before I left a whole year ago, I've been replenished. And in case you are wondering - there was even toilet paper. Sadly (or maybe luckily), no chocolate was found.

Now, having said that...even though I only had $4 to spend for the rest of the week, I spent less than $10 in 3 days. I got a free 907 g bag of coffee. I got a free bottle of hot sauce. I got a free taco. Free use of a vehicle, and free help to move all my things.

So I can't find my receipt for my burrito...I'm saying it was about $9.50. That means that I've overspent by $5.70. Next week's budget = $29.30. Oh but wait...I still need to get through tomorrow and the fridge and pantry are all but empty. Hmmm.... this seems to be getting worse, rather than better.

Just did a quick look in all the places I keep food (no, I'm not a hoarder!) and tried to find something for dinner. I've got some sushi rice, quinoa, rice noodles, spaghetti noodles (one portion), veggie stock, soy sauce, hot sauce, cereal (one portion), soy milk (enough for a couple teas and a bowl of cereal), almonds, mandarin oranges, nori, tons of coffee, tea, sugar, agave syrup, earth balance butter, wasabi paste, ginger, rice vinegar, salt, olive oil. That sounds like a lot of food. I guarantee you, the only meal I can make out of ANY of that, is to use the rest of the cereal and soy milk and have a bowl of cereal for dinner. Sometimes, that's great. But to have no other choice? Hell, this sucks. So, even though I thought I was doing well this week, turns out, I've gotta go spend a whack of money to get me through the next 8 days. And I don't have a whack of money. I have $29.30. I have soy milk left for my coffee in the morning, but nothing for breakfast. All the hot cereal is gone.

Just to budget out loud here:
Soy milk - $4
Hot cereal - $4
Veggies - no idea
Snacks - $8 (for example, two boxes of granola bars)
Chocolate - You're damn right I'm having chocolate this week - $3
Without fresh fruit and veggies or anything else, that's already 2/3 of the budget. For the week.
Ha! This is not going to happen. I repeat: NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

I have to alter my budget to allow for more fresh fruit and veggies, more snacks in-between meals, and better quality food. If I don't, it could seriously be a danger to my health and well-being. That is not a risk I'm going to take without having a gun held to my head.

Epic fail, anyone? This is upsetting, but also quite vividly illustrates how freaking hard it is to live on $5 a day! I'm falling apart!


So, in light of recent events - today's lack of energy/concentration/general drive to do anything - I'm going shopping tomorrow. I might have to go over my budget, but I seriously need some nutritious food. I have no energy (which is severely affecting my ability to walk everywhere - it's my mode of transportation), my concentration is severely affected (writing this is taking way too much effort), and I'm finding myself physically clumsy (more than usual for all your smart asses out there), and I just feel...unhealthy. I am drained. Also, I'm lacking one serious joy in my life - cooking and eating (yes, that is one joy - if I cook it, I'm gonna eat it). I love it. I love putting together healthy, colourful meals that taste amazing and enjoying them either with friends, or even just on my own. My mood is affected because I just am not stoked to eat anything that I have. It's just sustenance at the moment. It just fills me up...sometimes. How did I think that I would be able to deny myself the pleasure of wonderful food, when my whole life has been filled to the brim with awesome, delicious, nutritious, filling food from all over the world (my mom and all my aunts and some of my uncles and my sister and cousins and friends are great cooks, bakers, chefs, or Thai food ordering masters)!?

After only two weeks - I'm finding this impossible. Even with all the free stuff. Even with stocking up before hand. Even with planning my meals, and barely eating out.

I have tomorrow to fend for myself - cranking my spending over the budget for the two weeks. I am at the point of not caring because I'm hungry, lacking nutrients, and it's affecting every aspect of my life. Wow, am I excited to eat tomorrow, but right now...all I can think about is pizza. Dare I order one? Now this is getting nuts...it's 10:15 and I'm thinking of ordering pizza because my day was not filled with awesome eating (two bowls of cereal, one bowl of left over pasta with a sauce using the rest of my veggies - onion and carrots, punctuated with about 20 almonds, 3 cups of coffee, 2 cups of green tea, 6 mandarin oranges, and a bag of chips). My body is seriously pissed.

By the way - I spent $1.25 in a vending machine tonight before my class. On a bag of chips. They were less than tasty. In real life, I would never do that. My backpack would be filled with healthy, organic granola bars, fruit, chocolate, juice, etc. This budget is affecting my ability to make healthy food choices.

So, I've just gone to the fridge. My side is empty. I've taken two eggs (there's about 20), and the water is boiling for me to poach them. I've also located a cheese bagel (in the bread garage along with 2 full loaves of bread) that I'm gonna put the eggs on. And then I will have a glorious feast. I'm hungry, and honestly don't give a damn about the rules. Tomorrow I will pick up some bagels and eggs to repay whoever I've taken them from, and also give myself some food. I'll probably also get veggies, hummous, soy milk, cheese, apples, bananas, hot cereal, nuts and dried fruit, yummy granola bars and snacks and CHOCOLATE! I'm still going to try to stay within my budget - the best I can. ($30)

I've just realized I've got nothing for breakfast. Will have to eat on the way to school. Oh...I also have nothing to pack for a lunch. Have to grab something in-between classes. Being so short on cash, leaves me ill prepared for the future (even if that future is as close as tomorrow), and my ability to even plan for it. There are so many people living on worse than what I'm putting myself through to prove a point. A lot of people are scared to do anything about it for fear of losing their job to someone who shuts up and just does what they're told. So where's the incentive for governments/employers to raise wages if there is always willing people to work harder and harder, for less and less in return!? Others are lacking education (or access to it - my three courses are $1500) and/or skills, or even just the contacts in whatever industry they are trying to get into (as a foot in). They have no choice but to continue working their current jobs because bills, children, healthy and hungry bellies will not wait for anyone. (I'm working 5 days a week at the moment, and taking classes on the other two days. I do not get a day off. If I continue to eat this way, I will most certainly be calling on all sorts of health issues and my immune system will be weaker. Sick days = even less money. And so begins the cycle. For me, this schedule is only temporary - for less than 2 more months. I couldn't do it much longer (even on $30 a day), if I can do it at all, but I know lots of people that try).

All I know is that these are the best, stolen, poached eggs on a cheese bagel I have ever had.